10 Ways to Increase the Release of Obsessive Eating

When I first started Dr. Lisa Weight Control Therapy Blog, I really didn’t have any goals or objectives. I just wanted a place to write my thoughts that didn’t fit the academic writing I’m trained for in addiction psychology. As such, I didn’t think I’d have too much of an audience in the beginning. I was wrong. From the start, my thoughts as a practitioner and as an individual in recovery from binge eating disorder and food addiction on topics that addressed obsessive eating, weight control, spiritual recovery, and emotional recovery pulled in interests from around the globe. I learned implementing goals and steps increases the success in the release of obsessive eating. I also learned sharing stories without the academia flare was more palatable.

I won’t bore you with the details, but I now consistently hear and see positive results in my practice and from my blog and/or emails from a wide population seeking to release obsessive eating. I found with the goal to contribute steps to build a strong recovery foundation successes increased. True, it didn’t all happen at once, patients and blog readers confessed there were some ups and downs along the way. I’ve found that the 10 steps below can help any food addict increase their ability to release weight and/or make peace with their obsessive eating—whether it’s a new issue or struggles long lived. 

 Here are my 10 ways to increase the release of obsessive eating:

1.    Remove all forms of sugar from your diet with the exception of fruit for breakfast and a fruit included in the metabolic boost later in the day. Sugar is not just an empty calorie; its effect on the food addict is much more insidious. Obese patients think it’s about the calories, but it has nothing to do with the calories. It’s a poison by itself.  Forget the fact that obesity and diabetes has skyrocketed in America in the past 30 year and it’s responsible for diseases such as heart disease, hypertension, and many common cancers, it also triggers obsessive eating and thinking.

2.    Exercise daily at least 30 minutes. It’s important to exercise because it helps maintain a healthy body, reduce stress, and improves blood circulation. More importantly, it’s important to exercise because exercising is healthy. It’s proven to help peoples overall moods, and their health, such as boosting their immune system. Exercise has also been known to keep your mind healthy as well. Get outside and connect with nature and your Higher Source while you move.

3.    Sleep seven to eight hours each night. Sleep is crucial for overall health. This is because sleep helps your body to recover and rejuvenate from your days stressors, ridding your body of fatigues. It’s your body’s chance to recharge and heal. The only way to rejuvenate all of our organs is to rest the body and sleep. Our brains need time to process all of the information it receives daily. Some even say it’s your time to clear your mind and connect with the Divine Source.

4.    Write a daily gratitude journal. Journal writing is very personal and very intimate. It allows you to tap into your inner feelings and figure out what’s going on for you in your life. Journal writing takes many forms. I, myself, especially enjoy “diary writing,” which for the most part involves the unstructured, chronological recording of the extent of a person’s life. With that, I write daily gratitude posts listing all the blessings and treasure that unfold in daily life.

5.    Meditate daily. Meditation is the act of embracing an open and inviting clear space in the mind. It’s the discovery of a corner of the mind, a quietness within the mind, a sanctuary, a resting place—paradise in the mind, a place of peace. Meditation is performed in quiet—with no agenda. Some individuals meditate by using one word to concentrate on, while others hum one note, and still others focus on something to look at, such as a cloud or flower or even a spot on the wall. Some will use a mantra, repeating it over and over again. In meditation, we spend some time in the spaciousness of not knowing.

6.    Pray throughout the day. The beauty of prayer is that it’s personal. There’s no right way to pray, and there’s no wrong way—just your way. You can talk, sing, sit in silence, dance, cry, run, embrace nature, hug a baby, kiss a puppy, and/or watch a butterfly swirl around a daffodil—all in the name of prayer. Prayer is powerful. Prayer can change your life anywhere, any time—alone in quiet or in the middle of a room full of people. You can be rich, poor, belong to a church, temple, synagogue, or mosque, or sit alone in a field that stretches out as far as the eye can see. Our higher source is everywhere—within us and around us.

7.    Drink at least eight glasses of water daily. Just as plants and animals need water to survive so do human beings need water to survive and function properly. In fact, humans can’t live without drinking for more than a few days before deterioration and death set in.  About 55% of the female body (60% of the male body) is made up of water with the muscles and the brain about 75% water. Although hydration for survival is of the utmost importance in drinking water, drinking water hydrates your skin and makes you look younger, helps fend off hunger, and helps to combat ailments.  All good reasons to include water in your daily ritual. Hmmm, seems it might be a good idea to add pure water to the system!

8.    Eat three balanced meals (breakfast, lunch, and snack) and one metabolic boost (snack) daily every four to five hours. The best way to begin your food recovery journey is to follow a simple formula of having four meals a day and breaking down each meal according to an easy structure of specific foods: fruit, protein, fat, vegetables, low-fat dairy, and whole grains (see weightcontroltherapy.com for detailed menu and food suggestions). I've found, too, that at the beginning, the most workable way to do this is to commit to your food plan prior to the start of your day, rather than merely hoping you'll arrive at this optimal arrangement by random eating.

9.    Hug an adult, child, baby, and/or your fury child several times a day every day. According to the famous family therapist, Virginia Satir, “We need four hugs a day for survival, eight hugs a day for maintenance, and twelve hugs a day for growth.”  In the right setting and situation a hug is the best natural therapy for all kinds of conditions, a sign of approval and affection. It is such a simple uncomplicated gesture that speaks more to the other than actual words.  A simple hug—a universal cure available to all of us—is positive energy transmitted in its simplest and maybe oldest form.  

10.   Laugh, giggle, and smile. A simple smile goes a long way. It immediately puts a person at ease and often is returned spontaneously. Giggles and laughter, like a smile has medicinal benefits. When I think of the benefits of laughter Norman Cousins immediately comes to mind. About 30 years ago Cousins was diagnosed with an incurable and fatal spinal column illness with no known cause or cure. Against the advice of his doctors, he checked out of the hospital and secluded himself in his home reading humorous stories and watching movies that brought tears of laughter hour upon hour for a month only to return to the hospital with marked improvement—no sign of the disease whatsoever.

     Since then, research has shown that the health benefits of laughter are far-reaching including it can help relieve pain, bring greater happiness, and even increase immunity. So, laugh yourself to health—beat down compulsive eating with a good belly laugh. Think of little kids when they laugh so hard they fall down. Like smiling and kindness, laughter is contagious. Imagine if everyone partakes what kind of world we’d be in. Now go giggle....

Photos Taken by: Dr. Lisa
http://weightcontroltherapy.com/

Is It Time To  Clear Your Space?

I flicked on the light, plugged in my fountain and oil lamp, opened the blinds to let the natural light in and rolled up my sleeves prepared to dig into my chore ahead.  At the stroke of midnight on New Year’s Eve I resolved to clear out clutter in my office and open my work space to rekindle the spiritual energy my office is known for. I spent an entire day dusting, vacuuming, scrubbing window ledges and shredding patient files older than seven years so I’d have space for the stack of files behind my chair, heaped on my desk and tucked in the credenza. I had my work cut out for me.

 
As I moved in silence, from one task to the next, memories of patients swirled in my mind. My heart ached as I came across several patients who died over the years. We bonded—swapped eating disorder war stories—and grew in spiritual, emotional, and physical recovery.
 

When I happened upon Martin’s file (anonymous name), caressing his folder as if he were still present, I remembered the first session of psychotherapy and hypnosis, how trapped he’d become in his body. Martin carried two hundred extra pounds on his 5’10” frame. Without opening his file, all our past conversations bubbled up within me. Like many of my patients, Martin believed therapy with me was his last strand of hope to release his obsession with food.

We began our session with the standard questions I ask during the collection of data phase when first working with a patient. Once I had gathered the medical, psychological, family, and work history I moved into personal belief systems to uncover hidden blocks and buried issues with regards to his eating disorder. I asked Martin, “Do you believe you are responsible for your own recovery? Is it the trigger food(s), or your lack of spiritual connection, or both, that prevent you from recovery? Can your recovery take precedence over an obsession with and addiction to the idea of weight loss? Are you ready to clear out the clutter in your thought process?

 
We discussed different approaches to treating his disordered eating and obesity. I suggested a program of recovery can include but need not be limited to: psychotherapy, a Twelve-Step program, an `anonymous’ support group, the advice of a nutritionist experienced in food addiction, and a prayer group—or a church, synagogue, or mosque group. And the list goes on. I asked, “Which components from this list attract your attention?” He opted for therapy, a nutritionist, and a prayer group affiliated with his church and Twelve-Step program addressing his compulsive eating.

It’s my belief if you’re not in peak condition, mentally, physically, spiritually—if you’re not “right” with your surroundings, and comfortable in your own skin, your full potential will be stunted. Martin believed this to be true, that in order to open his full potential he needed to tap into any and all help available and clear out the clutter in his thought process.

Many of us undergo serious health consequences as a result of food abuse. Initially Martin’s recovery from compulsive eating was out of a medical necessity—raging cholesterol—which led him to seek a doctor of addiction psychology for food addiction. 

 

Most of society doesn’t understand or accept food addiction as a real condition. In fact, people tend to be more understanding when an alcoholic doesn’t drink because so many people don’t drink today, either because they have a problem with alcohol, take medication, or they don’t want to drink and drive. Moreover, alcoholism is seen as an addiction; whereas, this isn't the case with food addiction.

Although Martin managed to reach and maintain a healthy weight, he died at 57 from congestive heart failure, which most likely resulted from lifelong poor lifestyle habits. Sometimes patients go past the point of no return and their bodies can’t repair. Perhaps this was the case for Martin.

Today, my office sparkles and the space I so needed is restored. Although I shredded a mountain of files, the stories will forever remain etched in my heart. As I closed the blinds, shut the lights, unplugged the fountain and oil lamp, I took one last look back at my now squeaky clean quaint space I so love to work in, and smiled at the thought of Martin so excited when he was able to once again tie his shoes, ride a bike, cross his legs, and button the bottom buttons of his shirt. Yes, he died perhaps earlier than his time, but he died after years of getting his life back—no longer imprisoned by his weight. It’s never too late to clear out the clutter and reach for the stars, even if you only touch the moon.

Photos by: Dr. Lisa Ortigara Crego

Dieting on Empty: The Problem with Diet Mentality

I recently helped my patient Melinda sift through her New Year’s resolution, coaching her on diet mentality and how to make healthier food choices to quiet her binge eating. She is a voracious dieter, never trusting herself to put together an eating-for life formula to compliment her lifestyle. In short, she had all the makings of another New Year’s resolution diet fiasco—or so I thought.

Melinda didn’t stick with her diets, and after scrutinizing her timeline of expectation—lose two pounds a week on a 1300-a-day calorie diet—I can understand why.

It looked nothing like my own food-for-life formula, which offers a satisfying mix of balanced meals, exercise, meditation and prayer from an assortment of personal experience and quality recommendations from  patients I’ve spent years curating and tweaking for 23 years.

Melinda’s diet left her hungry, weak, and craving sugary and salty foods.

My patient could have groomed her assortment of diet rituals, but why should she? Like many patients, she was open to try a new diet with the promise of quick weight loss, but not especially determined to stay on it, and her initial experience failed to deliver the promised weight loss in a more efficient way.  The time and emotional energy she’d invested in it hadn’t convinced her on the positive results, and she wasn’t motivated on investing more time.

One of the greatest strengths of investing in balanced meals, exercise, meditation, and prayer is its ability to free the binge eater from diet mentality. For some it’s a way of making peace with years of on-and-off dieting and to release weight for once. For others, it’s a new full-proof formula encouraging food as fuel, exercise as energy booster, meditation and prayer to feed the spiritual hunger.

What  jumping off the diet-merry-go-around amounts to—weight loss, self empowerment, spiritual food, peace of mind—depends entirely on what lifestyle balance you prescribe.

Yes, embarking on clean eating and spiritual practice also poses problems for some. Learning to “feel” emotions rather than eat them requires a closer look at daily issues that were numbed by food. Jumping on a balance life  style formula is like winning the lotto—only instead of getting a pile of green cash—the winner pays taxes, learns of “family and friends” she didn’t know she had and the expectancy to clear everyone’s debt. The experience might be a pleasant one, but it takes work.

This initial flood of emotions and the effort required to address it stands between the dieter and the healthy formula it needs to make peace with diet mentality.

The list of successful patients continues to grow.

For dieters to turn over a new relationship with food, emotions, and experience a thriving, successful lifestyle, they must do the legwork. They must begin with a balanced breakfast, lunch, metabolic boost, and dinner; incorporate with daily exercise, meditation and prayer.

But no doubt people will lack the perseverance to trust that their body and emotions will respond. People lose patience when rapid weight loss doesn’t come, instead a slow and steady change of body, mind and spirit evolves over time.

Next New Year there will be no need of a New Year’s resolution promising to eat a meager 1300 calories only to give up due to starvation. Instead, Melinda will ring in the New Year with a svelte body and a clear mind and have no need to make a resolution at all because she adopted a lifelong plan that she can live with one day at a time.

Photo Taken By: Dr. Lisa Ortigara Crego

The Law of Higher Potential Rather Than New Year's Resolution to Release Weight and Obsessions with Food

Are you starting another diet this year? Did you last year make a new year’s resolution to lose weight once and for all? How about committing to a healthier lifestyle? Did you promise yourself you would exercise or better yet you bought a fancy machine to work off excess weight starting January 1, 2012? We all make promises and  yet resolutions are soon forgotten. What can you do this New Year to make it different?

Every January my phone rings off the hook, patients want an appointment to discuss their eating and/ or weight issues—to make a permanent change once and for all. Although most start with the best of intentions, the most common thing people do is make New Year’s resolutions that fall to the wayside after a few short days or at best a few months. Perhaps the answer is to stop making New Year’s resolutions and tap into the law of Higher potential—and insist and demand the remedy from the Source in order to live your plan every day regardless of what time of the year it is.

How many times have you tried to let go of your excess weight and/or obsessions with food promising a New Year's resolution? I bet you can’t even count. If you tapped into this blog I'm guessing you had an urgent need to resolve a continuous battle with commitments for positive change.

Do you believe in the law of higher potential? Or were you raised not to ask for things from God (or whatever you call your Higher Source) but rather to serve; that it's selfish to think of yourself and ask for you rather than think of others first.

With Catholic upbringing l felt guilty if I asked and expected to receive—that instead it's better to give and serve. I still believe to serve is an ultimate goal but also that the law of my higher potential is my inheritance and I can have that too. My relationship with my Higher Source has evolved over the years. I ask, expect, and receive.

Ask God for what you want and expect to get it. Persistence, with a strong-held purpose for what you desire, is the path. If you want to be thin naturally and free from obsessing about your weight or certain foods then ask for it. As certain as the sun will rise and set I'm certain you can free yourself of compulsive eating and weight issues once and for all—if you ask and expect. Don’t just whine and cry about your misfortune in this life, how you've been saddled with obesity or eating issues. Poor me isn’t going to cut it. Rise above and turn it over to the hands of God—expect and believe—and you will be lifted from your misery.

Each January we're bombarded with diet and weight loss products and pummeled with magazines, billboards, movie stars, and the television pushing the message thin is in. Is it? Take Margareta, a beautiful girl who could easily have been a movie star. At one time, not so long ago, she had the body, looks, and intelligence, but today her lovely curves are replaced with extra pounds as a result of diet mentality and faulty thinking. When she was thin she thought she was fat and obsessed over food and her weight until this belief came to fruition.  She expected and believed she was fat. She binged mostly and restricted occasionally. She thought about foods she’d indulge in every wakened moment. Sometimes she refrained but mostly she downed sugary gooey foods followed by salty, fried carbohydrates. She over-exercised daily in hopes of losing weight. Although she wasn’t obese she was overweight by 30 pounds. In her mind she felt 100 pounds overweight. Why? Because she couldn't see herself as she was but only as she thought she was. And to her, she was fat, frumpy, and dumb.

Many who struggle with the obsession of food and weight are like Margarita suffocating by their own hands. She didn't believe in her beauty and that a Higher Energy would lift her burdens.  Like many of us, she white-knuckled her way to her current weight.

Margarita has a history of being either too thin or too heavy and rarely in the middle. She didn't trust the natural foods God provided to fuel her and give her strength. She feared foods. She feared eating. She feared a “normal” weight because her life revolved around bingeing and dieting. What would life be like if she had to live in the now and get off the diet merry-go-round? In her mind she found relief jumping on the diet wagon after a cycle of binge eating. To her, food represented fat. We discussed eating healthy meals every four to five hours and eliminate foods that triggered her negative thinking and prompted her cravings. We talked about the power of her mind to connect with her Higher Potential. At first, she was apprehensive at the thought of setting positive health intentions and trust in the law of higher potential, but something clicked and change took hold. Her body returned to a healthy weight and diet mentality was a thought of the past.

I don’t mean to simplify the answer. Coming to terms with compulsive eating takes work. Where do we put the trust first: God, self and then good food. What is good food? No doubt to eat real foods that don't trigger compulsive eating is an excellent start place. Simple carbohydrates may trigger obsessive thoughts about food. Should you remove these foods first or call upon God first? Can you reach a Higher Source—your law of higher potential—while in the throes of eating addictively? Turn to God first and let him carry you.

Think of the Footprints:

A man asked, “Lord, You said that once I decided to follow You, You’d walk with me all the way. But I have noticed that during the most troublesome times in my life, there is only one set of footprints.” The Lord replied, “My precious, precious child, I love you and would never leave you. During your times of trial and suffering, when you see only one set of footprints, it was then that I carried you.”

Turning back to you, I ask, how many times have you tried to let go of your excess weight and obsessions with food as a New Year's resolution?  You picked this blog for a reason. You are searching for the answer to what feels like a life-long problem. You have an urgent need. Like Margarita, you may have it in mind to lose 30 pounds.  You might look at that number and think you have to do it all now. But you don’t. Instead try and pray and insist and demand the remedy from a Higher Energy. Tap into your Source, it’s your inheritance—a gift for you. The Divine Source loves you. God, the law of Higher Potential, is there with you every step of the way. You are His child

And if you have trouble walking along with Him, let him carry you. He is strong and tireless, loving and kind. You are worthy of his love. Give Him a try. What do you have to lose? (No pun intended). You can ask for things from God. It’s okay to serve yourself. It is not selfish to love you and to let your Higher Source love you. Break free from your obsession with food and step into a life with peace and tranquility—your Higher potential.

Thanksgiving!

Be comforted dear soul! There is always light behind the clouds.

~Louisa May Alcott, Little Women

Thanksgiving is a day of thanks, a day of praise, a day of gratitude for the fortunate. Who is fortunate? Is it the rich person? Perhaps the one with a roof over the head? Or is it purely existence?  Is the fortunate one the person present living? It's different for everyone. My fortunate is the ability to stay present—in the now—and give thanks and praise. Present living was not always a possibility for me in the past, but now, living in this moment befriends me. Of course it's not always so easy when life is filled with trials and tribulations. 

Is there always a light behind the clouds?

Can you sit still on this day of Thanksgiving and connect to the present even if there’s a dark cloud over you? Have you ever tried to stay quiet in the mind driven by gratitude? It's pure heaven. The mind always wants to think about what needs to be done next or what we already did. It's not so easy to focus on the here and now and bask in grace and gratitude when daily worries distract you from the abundance that is yours. Mortgage payments, troublesome spouses, out of control children, roofs leaking, a headache, even sour milk can interfere with your gratitude on this day of Thanksgiving, but your Higher Source (Whomever you turn to—God, Jesus, Sun, Energy, etc.) during challenging times showers continuous blessings and love down on you.

What makes me fixed on staying present when chaos surrounds me is deep breathing my way to calm—the present moment. Like you, many of my loved ones are not here on this day of giving thanks, they died or live in another state but they remain in my heart, which encourages me to sit still in gratitude for what I have in the here and now.

I took a long luxurious bike ride this morning along the Inter-coastal and Atlantic ocean with the most spectacular view before me side by side with one of my sons. As we pedaled our way up the bridge we witnessed the sun peak out over the purple/orange backdrop on the ocean shoreline breathing in the sea air.  My legs are strong and my energy abound. My bike moves with me as if we are one. A new day is about to begin. I am in the now—present.

Thanksgiving was not always a time for me to sit in gratitude. I’m a recovering food addict, and in the past, today marked the eating frenzy that launched my holiday eating. Actually, truth be told, that’s not true,  my out of control food fest began from Halloween until January 1 when I’d make my New Year’s resolution. On Thanksgiving day I’d until I could eat no more—until the food was all the way up to the rim of my throat and my pants cut into my bulging stomach—promising I’d diet come Monday. And Monday never came.

I am an addict addicted to processed foods and this holiday for most food addicts is lethal because there is no end to the eating or at least until we are so full the pain is greater than the need for that one more bite.

Food addiction is a loss of control over eating coupled with the physiological tolerance and psychological dependence that occurs when a specific stimulus (food) is ingested. Typically, this addiction can result in negative consequences for basic life functions and relationships with family; social situations; intimate relationships; the sufferers relationship God and spiritual development; or in relation to the law, health, and work life.

Early in childhood I was fixated on sugar—never getting enough and going to great extremes to obtain it: stealing, hiding and hoarding. Although I didn’t have an awareness of food addiction, I knew something was wrong. In hindsight, I realize I ate out of control and bargained with myself and God to stop—after this one last pastry. I felt shame if I got caught stealing food or money to buy food; yet, I didn’t have the mentality to understand I was compulsive eating until my adolescent years when weight began to pile on. And even then I didn’t know there was an actual eating disorder called, binge eating disorder—and that I had it.

What I did know was my friends ate when they were hungry and stopped when they had enough and didn’t hide or sneak their foods nor had shame. Food addicts have a severe and ongoing disturbance in the manner in which they handle food. The depiction of addiction to food resembles the hallmarks of any addiction. The food addict is caught in the grip of a compulsive, habitual behavior that can’t be controlled.

The binge eater begins eating when she didn’t plan to and can’t stop eating when she wants to. Addiction is the persistent and repetitive enactment of a behavioral pattern the person recurrently fails to resist and that consequently leads to significant physical, psychological, social, legal, or other major life problems. Loss of control over eating and obesity produce changes in the brain, which is similar to those produced by drugs of abuse.

Today I practice mindfulness. The dictionary defines mindfulness as calm awareness of one's body functions, feelings, content of consciousness, or consciousness itself. I am totally conscious of my fingers dancing over the keys putting words together. I am told mindfulness is the path to liberation and enlightenment. It is the intense purpose of staying in the now. I get this. 
 

So, today I am present. I refuse to think about what needs to be done next or what I already did. I am present with each breath in and out. I am present to the sounds of birds singing and the whispers of the wind as it folds through the palm trees out my window. I am here and now. What makes me fixed on staying present is is the peace and tranquility it brings. And of course the whiff of turkey baking in the oven doesnt' hurt! 

Photos by:  Dr. Lisa Ortigara Crego

Defining Moments

"It is not the mountain we conquer but ourselves."
~Sir Edmund Hillary

I awakened to the sound of the phone—ring after ring—I just want it to stop. I pulled the pillow over my ears and hunkered down deeper into the mattress, but it droned on and on beckoning me to answer.

Barely awake, I glanced at the clock noting it was 4:00 in the morning. I stumbled as I made my way to the kitchen to learn who was on the other end of the phone.

I pressed the cold receiver to my ear and with great trepidation  answered, "Hello." My father's panic voice blurted out,  "It’s your Mom—she had a stroke! The paramedics are here. I don’t know what to do, they say they have a shot they can give her but I have to know the exact time she had her stroke. If  they give her the shot too soon or too late it will kill her."

 The room swirled as I tried to grasp what he was saying.  I stammered something back, but to this day I don't know what I said in response. After we hung up, I recall I stood dazed and paralyzed in fear for what seemed like hours staring at the phone back in it's cradle, not certain what to do. 

A defining moment— my life would never be the same.

The dreaded call was Saturday morning, the eve of Easter back in 1998. Could it be only eight hours before I was skating with such glee with my eight year old son Benjamin and collided and tumbled to the ground only to rise laughing it off twirling under the stars smiling and thanking God for what a glorious life I was living. I practiced as a clinical psychotherapist and was soon to marry my prince, living in my dream house the perfect life. And now, mom was faced with life or death. How quickly my world was turned upside down.

Driving bleary eyed, as the tears tumbled down my cheeks, I dialed patient after patient to cancel my Saturday schedule, while trying to keep my eyes and car on the road as I headed to the hospital four hours away to accompany my Dad in what was one of the saddest and most difficult moments of our lives.

We sat in the intensive care unit, each in our individual silent prayer, only interrupted with periodic conversation and sobs of disbelief. The neurologist tarnished any hope we mustered up when he inhumanely blurted out she would never walk again and guaranteed she'd endure a continuous down turn for the remaining days of her life.

Dad lowered his head into his hands shaking it back and forth mumbling, barely audible, "No, this can't be, not again," as he questioned his decision to not give mom the shot earlier this morning with the paramedics. He raised his head up slowly from his hands and he recounted one of his defining moments when his mom clung for her life nearly 50 years earlier in intensive care, and he, the oldest son, needed to translate from Italian to English and back from the doctors to his family. He made serious decisions then and serious decisions now both intertwined and played over and over in his mind.

His mom died.

He never got past his guilt and grief. And now he was faced with his wife of nearly a half of a century facing the end of her life as they both knew it.

Mom was obese, she picked up a  cigarette habit in her fifties, and didn’t exercise and favored high fat foods all contributing to  her situation she now faced.

I pulled my chair up as close to mom as I could, without climbing in the bed with her, and held her limp had in mine. I always admired her tiny dainty hands and feet. I watched her struggle to take one shallow breath then pause and exhale and repeat—the oxygen machine swishing in the background —her eyes closed—slipping further and further away.

There I sat inhaling the  nauseating  smell of bleached sheets mixed with  rubbing alcohol as I pulled the spare blanket from the foot of the bed around my shoulders—teeth chattering from the cool temperature to ward off germs—when my attention went to my left leg throbbing. For a brief moment my mind moved from mom to my left leg. I startled when  I saw what I thought was a teeny scratch from a fall I had taken and brushed off  the night before while skating with Benjamin—it oozed with infection. I hadn't realized it was worse than I thought merely a few hours ago. Again, I pushed it out of my mind and made a life changing decision.

It was instant, at that moment, I vowed to bump up my mission to help eating disordered and addicted patients to recovery. For the rest of my life I'd give of my heart and soul to find answers and direction for those in the same space as my mother who couldn't conquer obesity. I promised to God then and there that I'd share and teach how I learned to let go of my once obese body, eat free of sugar, flour, and wheat, and lean on spiritual recovery.

I couldn’t save mom but I darn sure could share what I know with those who still had a chance to turn their lives around.

Mom died at 67 years old. She lived four more years after her stroke completely paralyzed. Those days were very good times and very bad times all rolled into one.



Now, on the Eve of every Easter I bow my head in remembrance of the early morning call over 13 years ago— when my life turned a new direction—a defining moment. I'm not saying eating free of sugar, flour, and wheat is easy but death or paralysisis is certainly worse.

Life is brief—live now, laugh now, and pray now. 

http://weightcontroltherapy.com/

Photos Taken by Dr. Lisa Ortigara Crego

I Was On the Oprah Show—Almost!

Okay, so I wasn't on Oprah, and perhaps almost was only from my perspective. The show was on persons who lost over 100 pounds and kept it off and of course were inspired by Oprah. I got close to being chosen but my mistake was not pinpointing a specific Oprah show that inspired me.

I had trouble picking a show because ALL of Oprah's shows motivated me  in one way or another. I watched her from back in the early Chicago days on AM Chicago when I was struggling financially, physically, and emotionally. Often I only had a few dollars to my name and barely enough money to fill my gas tank and yet I never found it difficult to binge eat. Hmmm, an addict—food in my case—always finds money for the substance one way or another.

When the Chicago brutally cold winters became more than I could stand, I moved to Florida—very saddened at the idea of not watching AM Chicago which Oprah hosted. But, as luck would have it, the Oprah Show was syndicated a few months after I moved (September 8, 1986) and one day before my birthday day on September 9, 1986. What a gift!

A few years back I dragged my sister Christy to Oprah's store in Chicago to purchase something from Oprah's closet. My sister didn't "get" why I had to have a piece of Oprah's personal wardrobe in my closet. She thought I wanted to wear it—but of course I wanted it authentic—untouched by my body. So, in my closet hangs an Oprah shirt, and not just any old shirt. It's a Richard Metzgar crisp white cotton shirt with bell sleeves that fan out at the bottom.

And of course while I was in Oprah's store I purchased an O baseball cap, magnets with her slogans of motivation for my refrigerators and I snapped a gazillion pictures of Harpo's buildings.

Yes, no doubt Oprah has inspired me, not only in weight loss success but in all of my successes, even though I couldn't pick a particular show.

So, what does this have to do with almost being on Oprah's show—or anything for that matter.  Although I failed to mention what particular show inspired me, which cost me the chance to appear as a guest on Oprah's show, it didn't stop me from reflecting on how far I've come in understanding my food addiction and helping scores of others find answers and direction to their eating disorders.

No doubt, Oprah has been a mentor to me from back in the days when I was a young woman who branched out alone from a small town in Wautoma Wisconsin back to my roots in Chicago, Illinois at the age of 21, without any degrees or money in my pocket and made my way through college, master's degree and a doctorate degree. I had tons of student loans to carry me through my dreams and to date I am happy to report I'm debt free because I learned to respect myself and my money. Yes, I learned this from many of Oprah's shows.

I always felt (and feel) each step towards growth Oprah made I did too—even with weight going up and weight going down. I, like Oprah, had a best friend Yvonne, who I cherished and still do. She died in 1997 in her sleep. Watching Oprah helped me through the most trying loss I had ever had at that time.

Prayer, meditation, intentions, intention map were tools I learned years back from Oprah's shows—with the intent to go on Oprah.

Dr. Wayne Dyer, in Excuses Begone! states, "...when you engage in the act of active contemplation, you set in motion a powerful force—you allow yourself to be lived by the great universal mind or Tao (p.103). In other words when you set the process of creation into action, what you contemplated comes to fruition.

The day the show I almost was on aired my heart ached with anticipation as it began and then as I watched each persona twirl and unveil their large clothes, letting them fall to the floor, a burst of relief took hold. This is not what I represent—diet mentality and showing off weight loss. Instead, my goal is to paint a picture of hope and relief from food addiction and eating disorders. I aspire to light the way to a better way of living. I bring focus to recovery and the added boost is weight loss if needed.

I  hold a doctorate in addiction psychology and I'm certified as a certified eating disorder specialist and have personal recovery from an eating disorder which helps me to help others.

So, I didn't make it on the Oprah Show, I'm still contemplating and sending out my intentions which I intend to manifest to appear on OWN but in a different capacity than a rah rah look at me and my weight loss to let me show you the way to peace and tranquility once and for all—to break free from your food addiction and obesity.

I'm relieved my Higher Source didn't manifest my intention prematurely. My time will come. Oprah's made a huge impact in my life and will continue to in all my adventures left to unfold.                                              

I no longer want to be on the outside looking in to what might have been but rather to what will be.

Photos taken by: Dr. Lisa Ortigara Crego